Anyone else feel like January was such a long month? Not in a bad way, necessarily. But it sort of sputtered along, taking its time. Now that February is here I feel like things will start to get busy. Between travel plans, a growing business, and trying to be more active in our community, we're starting to put things on our calendar. And I love it.
The quiet time with Jon has been great. We got married and then found ourselves with with months on end of time to be together, getting to know each other intimately and without the distractions of a wedding to plan, family obligations, or established lives. We moved and had nothing but each other. The past nine months have been us against the world, really, and I feel like I've learned so much in that time.
The year mark is fast approaching and I can honestly say that marriage is way more than I expected. I don't think there's any way to truly prepare for it. Marriage is a long haul with one person. I've had roommates before, but this is different. I share every space with my husband. We share a bed, a bathroom, meals, laundry. If I want to watch a show he doesn't like or update my social media, I carve out that time with him, setting aside a couple hours every once in a while where we exist in separate rooms.
It's so different from the days I used to go home wishing I could spend the night with him, dreading whole days where we wouldn't see each other. But the crazy thing is that I love him more now than I did then. When we do spend the time apart, I always end up walking into the next room because I miss him.
Marriage is complicated. Not in the way we see in the movies with secrets, affairs, or other devious activities. It's complicated in that I can simultaneously want my alone time and also need him with a fierceness that I haven't experienced before.
I hear you, dear reader, telling me that this is still our honeymoon period. You're thinking that one day this will all pass. That I'll stop missing him so much from the next room. But I really hope I don't. I hope that Jon continues to constantly pull me into really long hugs. I hope that I always sneak into our spare bedroom to say hi when he's playing a computer game. I hope that these little affections become a mainstay for us, a marker of this life that's just beginning.
Our lives will continue to change. This duty station will end in less than two years, we'll move into a house, we'll start having kids, and life will expand from what it is now. But we can hold onto what we've got here if we're willing to do the work to keep it that way.
I'm willing to put in the work. I'm confident I can say the same for him.